Why is it that couples who are friends try to fix you up, yet your single friends don't?
I had a call this week from a couple I'm friends with, who asked me if I would like to meet a friend of theirs. They gave me her name, and surprisingly enough.... I know who she is. And she is exactly as they described her: intelligent, beautiful, witty, loves music and mingling. No doubt! A perfect match!!!
My reply was, "No, but thank you. Maybe later after I get my teenage daughter grown up and moved out, I will consider dating. But I REALLY appreciate you thinking about ol' Steve!"
That's not a lie. I know they have my best interests at heart. But why is it couples do this to you when single friends don't? I don't really have an answer for this. Any guesses?
Of course, this phenomenon isn't the first time I've experienced it. I've been approached with the same topic numerous times from friends of mine who are couples. You would think they are all reading Matchmaking From Fun to Profit: A Complete Guide to Turning Your Matchmaking Skills into a New Business (Matchmaking Institute). Perhaps if they read this book they would have better luck....
I have a theory about it! Maybe it's crazy; may it isn't. You're more than welcome to share your comments below and tell me if you think I'm crazy or not. But I think couples see your independence as a threat. Maybe not on a conscious level; perhaps sub-conscious. Think about it.
Two male friends -- one is taken; the other isn't. Is SHE going to be sub-consciously worried that some of the things the two guys get involved in may not be considered appropriate for a man who has a wife or a girlfriend? If the single man had a significant other too, would this decrease the likelihood of such activities from happening?
Does your male friend also sub-consciously see you as a threat to his relationship? Does he feel his girlfriend or wife is safer being around you if he knows you have your own partner?
I don't know of any discussion about this topic. Like I say, maybe this is just my own crazy theory. But since I've had a few years to think about this, it's what I've come up with. Like William Shatner would say, "Is this weird or what!"